My wife, Laura, and I got married days ago, and we had decided to keep the wedding children-free. To be honest, I thought that was the best decision. So when I was sending out the invites, I made sure the message was clear to everyone.
To some extent, I was sure that everyone would respect my decision and won’t bring their kids to the wedding. But there was one person I wasn’t sure of, and that was my 36-year-old brother David.
David got married at a young age and has four kids. Like every parent, those kids mean the world to him, so he takes them everywhere he and his wife go.
And trust me when I say that the kids are with him everywhere because I hadn’t witnessed even one family event in twenty-eight years of my life when David and his wife attended an event without them.
So, unlike other guests, I gave the wedding invite to him in person and even read it out loud to make sure David didn’t miss the little note at the bottom. “Kids are not allowed. Sorry for the inconvenience,” I finished reading.
“Child-free, huh?” David added in a sarcastic tone.
“Well, yeah. I think that’s the best decision!” I replied instantly.David glared at me. “Are you out of your mind, Richard? My kids have never been excluded from any event, big or small, let alone their own uncle’s wedding!”
“I’m sorry, David,” I said after a little pause, “but it’s already been decided, and everyone has to follow the rules!”
David didn’t say anything after that. I thought he was pissed at me, so I was about to apologize again, but then he spoke up. “I get it, man, no children means no children, no worries. I won’t bring my kids!”
I was relieved David didn’t get into a fight about it and seemed to accept the rule. However, I had a hard time believing he would agree to my request so quickly. Who’d have guessed my suspicions would turn out to be true?
A week later, the wedding day came. Almost everyone in the family arrived except David and his wife. I began thinking David was furious with me because I had refused to let him bring his children to the wedding.
So I decided to phone him and apologize. But just as I was about to dial the number, my best man informed me that David and his children had arrived.
I was burning with anger, and I went straight to meet him at the entrance. I greeted the kids and asked my sister-in-law to take them back to the car. When they left, I lashed out at David.“You can’t enter, David,” I said. “Kids are not allowed in here!”
“Calm down, Richard,” David retorted. “It’s not like your wedding will be ruined because of my kids. Why are you acting like that?”
I was furious. “Acting like that?! Didn’t I tell you about it before?”
“You did, Richard, but I didn’t think you were serious. They’re just kids, after all. You’re not going to kick me out of the hall just because I didn’t follow the rules, right?” David responded.
“Well, I can. GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, David! ” I yelled at the top of my voice.
David looked at me angrily. “You’re a lunatic, I swear. I mean, who does that to their brother?”
“I don’t want to explain anything to you now. Please leave!” I almost yelled at him.
“You know what, Richard? You’re an awful uncle and brother for sure, but you’re a simp too! I’m sure it’s your lovely Laura who has brainwashed you like this! If I were in your place, I wouldn’t have married a pathetic woman!” David said and walked away.
I was even more enraged by David’s snide remarks about Laura, and I wanted to stop him and lash out at him once more. However, our last quarrel was humiliating and loud enough for all guests, including my in-laws, to gaze at us.
My mother had to step in to calm the situation by persuading me to let it go and invite David and his family to the wedding. But I stood firm in my refusal. I was adamant about my decision and paid no attention to what others had to say.
But since that day, everyone hated me and sided with David, claiming I betrayed him and his family by acting coldly towards them when all they wanted to do was celebrate the occasion with my wife and me.
My father was furious with me for potentially and permanently destroying my relationship with David, his wife, and their children by excluding them from my wedding. David will never forget that day, he said. But first, let me explain why I did it.
I used to work for Laura’s dad’s company. He and his wife tragically died in a car accident. I was just one of the employees attending the funeral when I saw Laura for the first time.
A few days after the funeral, as I was on my way to the cabin, I met Laura at the office. She had come to collect some documents.
When I saw her, all I could think of was how sad she was during the funeral. So I asked her if she was doing well. I don’t know why but after talking to her that day, I felt like I wanted to learn more about her.
Luckily, we began meeting each other often, especially after Laura took over her dad’s position and came to the office every day. And before we realized it, we were in love.
Laura had returned to regular life somehow, but her trauma from her parents’ death remained severe, and she was undergoing treatment for that. Laura’s therapist had warned me not to do anything that might cause her mental distress.
We had gone to see a gynecologist just a few weeks before the wedding because Laura wanted to talk about her health issues and see if there would be any complications with her pregnancy. Sadly, it turned out that Laura could never become a mother.
If Laura knew this, she wouldn’t be able to bear it because she wanted to give birth and have a family. So I decided to hide the truth from her until her therapist gave me the green light. But Laura learned about it, and as I had expected, she was devastated.
I decided not to allow children to attend our wedding because I knew Laura would be even more upset if she saw them. She had even planned a court wedding because she didn’t want such a lavish wedding after receiving the sad news. But I knew she always wanted the wedding to be like this since she talked about it from the beginning of our relationship.
Yes, I could have told my brother the real reason, but trust me, he’s not good with secrets, and my family is such that if people knew Laura was taking therapy sessions and now couldn’t become a mother, they wouldn’t accept our relationship. So I think what I did was right.
You can hate me for what I did, but I love Laura, and I will do anything to keep her happy.
What can we learn from this story?
- Sometimes you have to lose something to gain something. Richard ruined his relationship with his brother because he wanted to save Laura from further depression.
- If you love someone, you stay with them through the good and bad. Just as Richard stayed by Laura’s side every time.
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